Another reason to love Tom Waits

Or should I hate Tom Waits as the latest in a string of people who have had similar (but frankly better and more creative versions of) ideas that I have come up with in my clever, clever brain?

Backstory: A few years ago – right about Easter time – a friend (Big Dan of the Skanktuary) and I headed over by foot to a local Walgreen’s pharmacy in search of a hunk o’ candy.  We had just retired from a few hours of brew-pub imbibery (please nominate for Real Word status), so we were feeling especially witty.  While perusing the vast sugary selection, it struck us that it’s very, very strange to celebrate easter by giving children chocolate symbols of execution.  Hershey’s bunnies are weird enough, but a cross made from chocolate is kind of beyond the pale, don’t you think?

So, as we riffed on this theme, we began coming up with other, similarly inappropriate candy items that one could market, in order to make a quick buck off of in the name of the Most High.  A chocolate Jesus with a nougat center was one item – My Sweet (and Nougat-Filled) Lord, we could call it.  We also had an idea for a  Sermon on the Mounds bar (or an Eternal Almond Joy, cuz sometimes you feel like a nut…).  Oh, there were others, the names of which slip my mind at the moment, but they were all quite clever, I can assure you.  (Feel free to add your own ideas as comments, by the way.)  “Immaculate Confections” was going to be the name of our company.

As Fate would have it, Tom Waits beat us to the punch.  (My life’s story.)  Here’s video evidence.  Enjoy.


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